Holding Pattern

My thanks to everyone for your support and kind words and happy ending stories (they really help)!.  Special thanks to Nat for providing me the link to http://www.babysamson.com/.  I’ve been searching unsuccessfully for blogs dealing with the diagnosis of congenital heart disease.  While Samson’s diagnosis is different than ours, it was still inspiring to read, and the blog contained a treasure trove of other blogs dealing with similar issues.  (Still undercover with that due to family Googling and my need to stay stealth, but I will provide initials to the diagnosis and will fill in the details later:  Primary diagnosis is TGA, secondary is multiple VSD’s and a few others things they’re still watching.)  I learned well the power of the blogging community through my infertility travels and am grateful to have found this new source of first-hand information.

Nothing much to report on the baby front today.  We’re in a bit of a holding pattern, which neither LG nor myself excel at.  We meet with the cardiothoracic surgeons at Children’s tomorrow.  I hope they’re ready for us, because we have a long list of questions prepared.  The biggest topic of discussion for LG and myself right now is whether to obtain a second opinion.  As I’ve mentioned, we feel very confident in our doctors (which is why I’m really torn on the subject), but when it comes down to it, reading a fetal echocardiogram is “observational” (versus looking at a definitive lab number or something like that).  It’s not so much our current diagnosis that we’re looking to confirm, but more that we want to be absolutely sure there is no trace of the rhabdomyoma, which was the initial diagnosis that led us to the cardiology follow-up originally.


In non-baby news, here’s what passes as romance in our household these days:

LG to me at a completely random point in time:  “Would you still love me if I were a lam.prey?”

For those of you (like myself) who had no idea what a lam.prey was before this post, it’s a disgusting sucking eel that looks like a slimy giant garden hose with teeth.  Why this popped into his head, I do not know.  Ah, the mysterious and magical workings of LG’s mind!


In sort-of baby news (just not my baby), a strange thing happened last week.  As previously stated, I work in HR.  One of the least favorite parts of my job (and that’s saying a lot because there are so so many least favorite parts) is dealing with employee relations issues.  I have heard and dealt with all manner of interemployee squabbles ranging from the serious (harassment) to the dicey (body odours, etc.) to the laughably petty (chews too loudly,  looks at me funny…)  I have never – until last week – dealt with the “pregnant co-worker slacking off and I have to pick up her work” complaint until last week and then it was 2 different cases from 2 completely different locations.  The first call came in the day after we got our diagnosis, and I had spent the entire workday doing Google research, so to say it hit a bit close to home was an understatement.  The call actually came from one of the HR managers on my team who phoned me for advice.  For this first time ever, I had to deflect and very briefly explained the situation and asked her to consult with another HR VP who just happens to be one of the few senior HR folks not pregnant right now…probably because he’s a guy.   I felt lousy about that, because I felt like I wasn’t able to separate my professional and personal life…but at that moment, I wasn’t.  The 2nd complaint deals with a group of pregnant ladies who sit right outside my office whom I privately dubbed the pregnancy cabal…because they never work and chat about baby stuff all day long.  While I understand all too well how consuming this time in a woman’s life can be, I am going to have to address it because they chat all day and then tell their bosses that they have too much on their plate and its causing them stress, which means other people are having to pick up their work.  Needless to say, I am not looking forward to THAT “coaching”* conversation.

*Polite HR term for a conversation that is typically nothing more than a “knock-it-off”meeting.  Good times.


8 Responses

  1. I don’t see anything wrong with a second opinion. If Nae’s ultrasound would’ve come back showing a heart problem, I would have gotten one. I think it’s your right to get one, if you feel it’s warranted.

    Have fun at your “coaching” meeting. That sounds like ALL sorts of fun! Maybe if your bring chocolate and give it to them after, they won’t be so mad at you? ;o)

    Take care, hon.

  2. 2nd opinion sounds really smart.

    Wow, I never really thought about all the crap that HR would have to do until this post. (Well, until this post and last week’s “The Office” episode.) Funny how we all come up with this jargon to make the unpleasant things sound more pleasant, huh?

    (((hugs))) to you. You are going through so much. Hope you have (at least) moments of peace.

  3. Thinking of you and hoping the appointment goes well — that you get some answers.

  4. 😦 i know what you’re going through. on one hand it’s so nice to know about stuff while everyone’s still inside….but then you have time to worry about it and wonder what will happen and what will you do. our fetal echo didn’t reveal even what the real problem was. in fact, everyone thought things were much worse than what they ended up being. and when baby boy was born he had something that no one had even seen in the first place.

    and still? i’m amazed at technology. in nursing school i got to work with little babies who had their hearts reconstructed since they were only born with three chambers instead of 4. 😦

    anyway…wanted to let you know that i am thinking of you!


  5. So glad that website was a help to you… I know she’s been really big into networking with other mamas of heart-problem-babies and community can be such a really strong thing.

    Lovely HR stuff. I guess there are some things we just can’t separate ourselves from when in the midst of a personal crisis, and you shouldn’t feel bad about passing that one on to someone else. Good luck talking to the pregnancy gabbers though. Sounds like fun times.

  6. I don’t envy you having to have that conversation, good luck with the pregnancy cabal.

    I hope your appointment with the cardiothoracic surgeons went well, thinking of you.

  7. Just popping in and letting you know that I’m thinking about you. Hope you are well, as is LG and baby too!

    Sending you a lot of love. Hope you can feel it.

  8. found a few blogs for you…





    i hope these and others that you may find through these will bring you strength and comfort in this tough time. You can do this!!

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